This Christmas season has been busy with some new activity. It's the first year we've experienced City Impact's Gifts of Love, doing foster care, and having a foreign exchange student.
Watching and hearing the community experience Christmas with dignity at Gifts of Love was really awesome. Last night the kids who participate in the ILA program had the chance to shop for their families, they were all very excited and it was cool to hear their stories and see their excitement!
Foster care has given me another view into what really matters. How often I stress out about trivial things and when you open your eyes and heart to the hurt all around you, I am struck by how selfish I can be. Our family has processed some tough things these past few days and we are praying and hoping that God will have his way in our lives... He's stretching us for sure. So, as Michael and I Christmas shop and look around us at the immense blessing of our family and children, we are even more aware of God's grace. I feel more aware of how it's not about what's under the tree, but it's about those who gather around it. I am so thankful for the safety of our home, for the love, laughter and peace that we enjoy. Praying for the children who don't have that, who are being abused, neglected, and forgotten this Christmas, may our eyes not be closed to the reality that surrounds us... praying that our house will soon be a place of healing for those in need!
Our foreign exchange student is experiencing Christmas American style for the first time... he's enjoying the food! He did some shopping last night and was able to buy some stocking stuffers. He is still struggling with language and also just engaging in life here in the States. I think he is really missing China and we are hoping that he soon embraces his new life here... because it's been a rough transition and he doesn't seem to want to be an American student. So your prayers are appreciated!
In this season of giving.. my heart is being transformed and I am thankful for the new perspective on life.. for the moments where I stop and appreciate God's love and peace in the midst of chaos.
Merry Christmas!!
2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
Showing posts with label heart thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label heart thoughts. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Friday, November 2, 2012
Whew, life is crazy!
I apologize for taking my sweet time getting back to blogging. I have missed the time I take to stop and reflect on the weeks that have gone by. November is here! October was filled with lots of great memories; Ethan (our foreign exchange student from China) arrived safely to the USA and to our home, production week at school went great (read more about that here at my hubby's blog) http://koinoiawithmichael.blogspot.com ,we celebrated our first Halloween in our new house, I am volunteering with the Color Guard at school helping them polish and develop routines for marching band and winter guard, also I start wrapping Christmas gifts at Von Maur in a couple weeks!
I love that November causes most of us to ponder all the great things we are thankful for. I know that I sometimes need the reminder to stop and enjoy what's happening here and now. Not to think ahead to the next thing on my list, but to enjoy the moment. I am very excited to be celebrating two of my nephews birthdays tomorrow and plan to also enjoy the Husker game with the family as well. Can't wait to catch up with everyone! It's been a busy fall and there is nothing like being together with your siblings to hear about what's happening in their lives and planning our next family get together at Thanksgiving! Love this time of year!
I love that November causes most of us to ponder all the great things we are thankful for. I know that I sometimes need the reminder to stop and enjoy what's happening here and now. Not to think ahead to the next thing on my list, but to enjoy the moment. I am very excited to be celebrating two of my nephews birthdays tomorrow and plan to also enjoy the Husker game with the family as well. Can't wait to catch up with everyone! It's been a busy fall and there is nothing like being together with your siblings to hear about what's happening in their lives and planning our next family get together at Thanksgiving! Love this time of year!
Monday, October 8, 2012
Arrival!
Happy to report that Ethan has arrived in Lincoln from Beijing, China. He had quite the experience coming here though. He spent 28 hours in the Chicago airport due to customs hold ups and missing the flight due to exhaustion and sleeping thorough it the next day. So he ended up flying into Lincoln late last night. Everyone is glad he is here safe and sound. He is very tired still though! His Aunt and Uncle live here in Lincoln and they have kept him last night and they are also keeping him tonight. We had the joy of hanging out with him this evening and can't wait until he can join our family tomorrow!! The boys had a great time bonding over PS3 and talking sports, Ethan seems to blend right in to the family! He brought us some amazing gifts from Nepal, he has traveled all over the world and we look forward to hearing more about his trips everywhere. It's amazing to think that he'd end up going to school here in Lincoln, NE. We are so happy he chose to come to the States!
Here's a few pictures:
Here's a few pictures:
Looking forward to all the fun we'll have this year!
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Embracing Life
I had a day that was really wonderful. Wanted to just list out all the little things that make life so good.
1. I feel really good, my allergies are getting less horrible! :)
2. I worked with 3 and 4 year olds today with an amazing group of people.
3. I had lunch with my sweet friend Amy and went to this fun little restaurant called Pepe's the environment, food and conversations were just amazing!
4. Got to do some shopping by myself tonight because I took Faith and her friend Hannah to a football game.
5. Took my lovely daughter out for a date night while our boys were at school.
6. And we are making it a family movie night!
This day was so wonderful! So many days just zip by and I forget to stop and take in each moment, to really enjoy the little things.. What a great day! Thankful!
Monday, September 24, 2012
It's not really ours...
In church yesterday they showed a video of a couple who sold their house and downsized, and I will paraphrase here on what I heard... they felt convicted that the life they were living needed an overhaul. They wanted to give more of what God had blessed them with back to others. This story of sacrifice inspired me in that we should be willing to give up and share what's not really ours anyway, it's God's.
I feel that this is our season of doing just that, our season to open our home to foster children and to a foreign exchange student. We are blessed to have a 5 bedroom house. A house that is such a blessing in so many ways; one of my favorite reasons is that we are only 2 minutes from our kids' school! What a wonderful opportunity to open our home up and use the bedrooms that we have, not just for ourselves, but for others. I am so excited to see what our story will look like, what amazing things will happen at our dinner table, people we've not yet met who we will come to call family, and I am thankful that we have room to spare! We are planning on welcoming in a young man from China soon. They are just waiting on his visa to get finalized. Pray that goes quickly for him. Hoping to have him here with us in a few weeks! I look forward to getting to know him and I know that Caleb and he will enjoy being sophomores together at LCS. Missions is still a passion in our hearts and God continues to use that passion in only ways He could foresee.
I am also excited to begin taking in a foster baby soon as well. We are waiting on the State's final seal of approval and should be licensed in about 2 wks. Can't wait to welcome in a new little one to our lives. Feel so blessed that we can step up and help. There is such a need for good foster parents in our state and city. Thankful that we have the room to take in a child for as long as needed. So we will converge on these very awesome opportunities at about the same time.
Thankful for the road we're on, for the many blessings we have, for a full heart as God expands our family in some unexpected ways, it's such an answer to prayer...stay tuned for details on all these moments ahead!
I feel that this is our season of doing just that, our season to open our home to foster children and to a foreign exchange student. We are blessed to have a 5 bedroom house. A house that is such a blessing in so many ways; one of my favorite reasons is that we are only 2 minutes from our kids' school! What a wonderful opportunity to open our home up and use the bedrooms that we have, not just for ourselves, but for others. I am so excited to see what our story will look like, what amazing things will happen at our dinner table, people we've not yet met who we will come to call family, and I am thankful that we have room to spare! We are planning on welcoming in a young man from China soon. They are just waiting on his visa to get finalized. Pray that goes quickly for him. Hoping to have him here with us in a few weeks! I look forward to getting to know him and I know that Caleb and he will enjoy being sophomores together at LCS. Missions is still a passion in our hearts and God continues to use that passion in only ways He could foresee.
I am also excited to begin taking in a foster baby soon as well. We are waiting on the State's final seal of approval and should be licensed in about 2 wks. Can't wait to welcome in a new little one to our lives. Feel so blessed that we can step up and help. There is such a need for good foster parents in our state and city. Thankful that we have the room to take in a child for as long as needed. So we will converge on these very awesome opportunities at about the same time.
Thankful for the road we're on, for the many blessings we have, for a full heart as God expands our family in some unexpected ways, it's such an answer to prayer...stay tuned for details on all these moments ahead!
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Am I pretty?
I've had a few moments lately where I've struggled with the age old question.. am I pretty? Ugh, that's hard to even say without the fear of people trying to reassure me that, "of course you are." and the last thing I need right now is comments like that adding to my self doubt... because then the reassurance in my head sounds like, "we have to say this..." and this is not my point at all. My point is I hate when I have days like this. I hate feeling like I'm not acceptable... but the real issue is that I feel like I am lacking something and I know deep down that I am acceptable, I am loved.. I just need to go to the One who can cover me in truth about who I am and not go searching for an ego boost from anywhere else.
I think I am in need of a long bubble bath and maybe a bit of pampering in the form of painting my nails and toes. That always perks me up! The struggle with my outward appearance will always be a struggle in the world we live in, I will always see someone thinner, better dressed, and more pulled together than I feel.. but I know that as it says in 1 Peter 3:3-4 "your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gently and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." I also need to remember Psalm 139:14, I love how the Message says it; "Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God - you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration - what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day."
Needed that reminder that I am marvelously made and getting it from the One who created me... nothing beats that!
I think I am in need of a long bubble bath and maybe a bit of pampering in the form of painting my nails and toes. That always perks me up! The struggle with my outward appearance will always be a struggle in the world we live in, I will always see someone thinner, better dressed, and more pulled together than I feel.. but I know that as it says in 1 Peter 3:3-4 "your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gently and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." I also need to remember Psalm 139:14, I love how the Message says it; "Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God - you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration - what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day."
Needed that reminder that I am marvelously made and getting it from the One who created me... nothing beats that!
Monday, September 17, 2012
Healed and Heading Out
Really thankful that my dad is fully healed! The recovery of replacing his ankle and fusing it is complete and he is wearing a shoe on both feet! No more boot!
I went to Omaha with my dad today and got to see the x-rays and was amazed yet again that doctors can do what they do.. all the screws and rods that are holding my dad's leg together and ankle in place. Amazing! Really grateful that he's not in any pain anymore! That's a huge blessing!
So tomorrow is moving day for my parents. They've been with us about 4 months and we've all settled into our routines... but tomorrow we will all have to settle into new routines. They'll be back on the road come October and heading back down to TX, so it was quite a treat having them here for the summer! Thankful for the times we spent together and the blessing of having room for them to stay and recover. I'll miss the full candy dishes and many options of coffee's. Also, the running all over Lincoln shopping with my mom and finding treasures together. We've shared lots of laughs and experienced life together, both the good and the bad days; it's gone both fast and slow, but tonight it really does feel like it flew by. I can honestly say it was a wonderful experience, life goes by really fast and I am thankful for the moments we shared together these past months.
My kids will remember this summer forever, they've gotten to know their grandparents better, so many memories and life lessons they won't forget! So many funny things, life experiences, and good conversations that came out of living under the same roof together. Tomorrow they'll set out and move back to their home on wheels and we'll look forward to hearing about their adventures on the road!
I went to Omaha with my dad today and got to see the x-rays and was amazed yet again that doctors can do what they do.. all the screws and rods that are holding my dad's leg together and ankle in place. Amazing! Really grateful that he's not in any pain anymore! That's a huge blessing!
So tomorrow is moving day for my parents. They've been with us about 4 months and we've all settled into our routines... but tomorrow we will all have to settle into new routines. They'll be back on the road come October and heading back down to TX, so it was quite a treat having them here for the summer! Thankful for the times we spent together and the blessing of having room for them to stay and recover. I'll miss the full candy dishes and many options of coffee's. Also, the running all over Lincoln shopping with my mom and finding treasures together. We've shared lots of laughs and experienced life together, both the good and the bad days; it's gone both fast and slow, but tonight it really does feel like it flew by. I can honestly say it was a wonderful experience, life goes by really fast and I am thankful for the moments we shared together these past months.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Multi-generational living
My dad is healing well from his surgery and I am happy to post that my parents and their dog will be moving back to their RV on Sept. 18th. We've enjoyed many wonderful, challenging, funny, and creative moments together. They will have lived with us 108 days by the time they move out; that's about 1/3 of a year. Some days it feels like it went fast and others it feels like its been forever. I will miss many things about them not being here. I've enjoyed shopping with my mom, her eye for decorating, and always having a willing partner when I run errands! I will miss many things about my dad too. His ever present sense of humor, greetings when I walk out of my room in the morning, talking politics and drinking wine or beer on the deck with him, and his jewelry making skills!
It's been a summer of memories and my kids will always remember the time their grandparents spent with us. They've really gotten to know them better, we've learned new things about them, they've learned new things about us. I am sure that they won't miss my constant insistence of a clean kitchen. My mom will be able to go back to her normal routines without having to think about mine. She'll be able to wash laundry whenever, not worry about all the hair her dog sheds and my constant vacuuming... :) I will miss their Dyson vacuum soooo much! I think I need to head out right after they leave and buy one! It was amazing!
All the funny quirks that make your family your family, my parents got a front row seat to ours and we also got a front row seat to their marriage. I am grateful for that, that we know each other better after they've lived here and that we survived it and still have a wonderful relationship. God is Good!
It's been a summer of memories and my kids will always remember the time their grandparents spent with us. They've really gotten to know them better, we've learned new things about them, they've learned new things about us. I am sure that they won't miss my constant insistence of a clean kitchen. My mom will be able to go back to her normal routines without having to think about mine. She'll be able to wash laundry whenever, not worry about all the hair her dog sheds and my constant vacuuming... :) I will miss their Dyson vacuum soooo much! I think I need to head out right after they leave and buy one! It was amazing!
All the funny quirks that make your family your family, my parents got a front row seat to ours and we also got a front row seat to their marriage. I am grateful for that, that we know each other better after they've lived here and that we survived it and still have a wonderful relationship. God is Good!
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Feeling down and out
I love football season. I enjoy the time spent with my family and friends in front of the TV rooting on my favorite teams. It's football Saturday and I felt down and out.. my allergies are bugging me and I think I am battling something more on top of that.
Needless to say I spent most of the day dozing on and off on the couch catching the Huskers here and there win the game. Michael and Caleb had an amazing opportunity from my brother Kraig to go to Memorial Stadium for the opening game of the season. They sat on the 40th yard line about 15 rows up.. super fantastic seats!
Michael was generous and made a pot of chili before he headed out to tailgate before the game and I was so grateful that I didn't need to plan the menu due to the fact I am feeling ucky. If you know me, I love a clean house, I work really hard keeping on top of everything, I vacuum almost daily, mop at least every other day, dishes are done right away, I am not trying to sound all uppity about it, it's just my usual routine. But today was not my usual, I feel sluggish and I didn't do the usual. My husband comes home from his day away and the dishwasher hadn't been started, it was pretty full I guess, the kitchen was kind of messy, and he was upset. He likes a tidy house and usually that's the way it looks. I was hurt by his frustrated comments about me leaving things a mess, and I cried. I am still fighting tears as I write this, I hate disappointing people. I struggle with letting someone down and I feel like I don't really have an excuse to just let down for an afternoon. Am I painting a stark picture of my husbands response to me? I don't mean to make him out to be some demanding perfectionist, he's not and he is incredibly helpful, he does almost all the cooking and I so appreciate and love him. But our marriage isn't perfect, we mess up, say the wrong things, don't apologize, and so on. This is just one of those moments, those days where my husband is not being sensitive to me. Hate nights like this, hate feeling sick and really hate knowing that my natural response is to just push myself to the extreme and clean every nook and cranny tonight, even though I feel feverish and icky. So, what should I do? .. I have no good response... so, off to bed; this girl is tired and moody!
Needless to say I spent most of the day dozing on and off on the couch catching the Huskers here and there win the game. Michael and Caleb had an amazing opportunity from my brother Kraig to go to Memorial Stadium for the opening game of the season. They sat on the 40th yard line about 15 rows up.. super fantastic seats!
Michael was generous and made a pot of chili before he headed out to tailgate before the game and I was so grateful that I didn't need to plan the menu due to the fact I am feeling ucky. If you know me, I love a clean house, I work really hard keeping on top of everything, I vacuum almost daily, mop at least every other day, dishes are done right away, I am not trying to sound all uppity about it, it's just my usual routine. But today was not my usual, I feel sluggish and I didn't do the usual. My husband comes home from his day away and the dishwasher hadn't been started, it was pretty full I guess, the kitchen was kind of messy, and he was upset. He likes a tidy house and usually that's the way it looks. I was hurt by his frustrated comments about me leaving things a mess, and I cried. I am still fighting tears as I write this, I hate disappointing people. I struggle with letting someone down and I feel like I don't really have an excuse to just let down for an afternoon. Am I painting a stark picture of my husbands response to me? I don't mean to make him out to be some demanding perfectionist, he's not and he is incredibly helpful, he does almost all the cooking and I so appreciate and love him. But our marriage isn't perfect, we mess up, say the wrong things, don't apologize, and so on. This is just one of those moments, those days where my husband is not being sensitive to me. Hate nights like this, hate feeling sick and really hate knowing that my natural response is to just push myself to the extreme and clean every nook and cranny tonight, even though I feel feverish and icky. So, what should I do? .. I have no good response... so, off to bed; this girl is tired and moody!
Monday, August 20, 2012
Inner Ramblings & the moments after
I have many conversations inside my head; those thoughts that bounce around prior to a conversation, or one that is yet to be.. or maybe one that will never come at all. I have found that sharing my thoughts in written format scares me. Although I greatly appreicate reading the honest, gut wrenching moments in others blogs, I am struggling with being that transparent in mine.
My blog tends to edit the moments that could step on others toes or hurt feelings. I just can't bring myself to the point of feeling like it'll be okay to share them.... but isn't that the point of this? Isn't my heart crying out to share the deep moments, the real life, the mess.. I crave that. So where do I start? And how much do I share? I think I will just start being "more me"... I may shock, offend, or annoy folks in the process, but all opinions can do that right? ... the honest truth may not happen as quickly as I dream. The layers may take some time to peel back... but I am taking a baby step..
Looking back at the journey that got me to this day, this moment at the pool talking with women who share their world with others through blogs, who open their hearts for all to see, I am inspired to do the same. Grateful to know and meet such brave women. Life is messy. I am imperfect. There, that was freeing! Welcome to my imperfect mess!
What is my greatest fear in being more real? That's the question that's been stewing in my head this afternoon. What will happen if I just lay it out there... will people still like me? That's what it comes down to for me most...being likable.. does that just sound crazy shallow? I think I am mostly likable... I can be a lot of fun, I am positive most days, but what about those days and times when I am no fun to be around, when I am feeling discouraged, angry, and overall ugly... will I still be likable? And why is being likable more important to me than authentic?. That's pandora's box for me... I have so many tales to tell about why pretending or putting on a face is sometimes my natural reaction rather than honesty. Hurt and shame can cause me to put on the mask or ignore the pain... BUT I am praising God that I am recognizing that a bit more quickly now, and I am trying to be more intentional with my friendships, to live life on life more openly, talking through the mess and knowing that the mess of life doesn't define me, I am who I am in Christ and He loves me. So my security can be found only in Jesus. I am secure to share the ups and downs, the joys and triumphs, heart aches and burdens; honestly without fear, but with tenderness and empathy.
My blog tends to edit the moments that could step on others toes or hurt feelings. I just can't bring myself to the point of feeling like it'll be okay to share them.... but isn't that the point of this? Isn't my heart crying out to share the deep moments, the real life, the mess.. I crave that. So where do I start? And how much do I share? I think I will just start being "more me"... I may shock, offend, or annoy folks in the process, but all opinions can do that right? ... the honest truth may not happen as quickly as I dream. The layers may take some time to peel back... but I am taking a baby step..
Looking back at the journey that got me to this day, this moment at the pool talking with women who share their world with others through blogs, who open their hearts for all to see, I am inspired to do the same. Grateful to know and meet such brave women. Life is messy. I am imperfect. There, that was freeing! Welcome to my imperfect mess!
What is my greatest fear in being more real? That's the question that's been stewing in my head this afternoon. What will happen if I just lay it out there... will people still like me? That's what it comes down to for me most...being likable.. does that just sound crazy shallow? I think I am mostly likable... I can be a lot of fun, I am positive most days, but what about those days and times when I am no fun to be around, when I am feeling discouraged, angry, and overall ugly... will I still be likable? And why is being likable more important to me than authentic?. That's pandora's box for me... I have so many tales to tell about why pretending or putting on a face is sometimes my natural reaction rather than honesty. Hurt and shame can cause me to put on the mask or ignore the pain... BUT I am praising God that I am recognizing that a bit more quickly now, and I am trying to be more intentional with my friendships, to live life on life more openly, talking through the mess and knowing that the mess of life doesn't define me, I am who I am in Christ and He loves me. So my security can be found only in Jesus. I am secure to share the ups and downs, the joys and triumphs, heart aches and burdens; honestly without fear, but with tenderness and empathy.
Friday, May 11, 2012
Energizing
Spending the day with my sister in law yesterday decorating for my nieces graduation party was so energizing! There were many little to-do's to get done but the best part was personalizing and thinking outside the standard graduation decorations. We had such a wonderful time hanging an amazing paper lantern display, using old furniture in new ways, adding a wishing well guest book, creating cute banners.. the list could you on.. it was just a wonderful day of putting together our creative minds and running with them! I will have to post pictures from the Saturday event so you can see all the fun little projects. I feel so blessed to have such a wonderful family, I am looking forward to celebrating another graduation and look forward to the many more that are yet to come. Congratulations Natasha!!
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Getting Ready?
Are you like me, that each day feels like you spend it getting ready for something else? I have found that lately I am constantly preparing for the next thing.. Our past few weeks have been busy!! We've had Musical Production going on, golf, concerts, painting at the new house, moving preparations, etc, etc... Each moment I spend a lot of time thinking about what's next, what needs to be accomplished, where I need to be getting to... arrghh the pace at times is maddening!
I am content to be sitting on my couch right now blogging.. thinking only of the words running through my head and feeling relief that it's at least my sole focus at this moment. I was listening to the radio this morning on the way home from dropping the kids off from school and the radio talk was about May Day. And how "mayday" can in turn mean a cry for help.. I loved the play on words and the thought that how often in my hectic pace of life I cry out to God for help... I felt a tug on my heart to lay down my day.. to give it to the Father who knows my worries, plans, expectations.. I can lay it down at His feet and let it go..
I want to be intentional about living in the moment, to enjoy the simple things that each day brings, to know that you can't relive this exact time and embrace the miracle of another day without thinking about what's to come... it's a struggle when you are in charge of the family calendar, but I know that time goes by so quickly.. I've watched another school year buzz by.. praying for help today to slow down.. to live in today, not getting ready for tomorrow.. but being present now...
I am content to be sitting on my couch right now blogging.. thinking only of the words running through my head and feeling relief that it's at least my sole focus at this moment. I was listening to the radio this morning on the way home from dropping the kids off from school and the radio talk was about May Day. And how "mayday" can in turn mean a cry for help.. I loved the play on words and the thought that how often in my hectic pace of life I cry out to God for help... I felt a tug on my heart to lay down my day.. to give it to the Father who knows my worries, plans, expectations.. I can lay it down at His feet and let it go..
I want to be intentional about living in the moment, to enjoy the simple things that each day brings, to know that you can't relive this exact time and embrace the miracle of another day without thinking about what's to come... it's a struggle when you are in charge of the family calendar, but I know that time goes by so quickly.. I've watched another school year buzz by.. praying for help today to slow down.. to live in today, not getting ready for tomorrow.. but being present now...
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Pondering Finances..
Michael and I are taking a financial class right now and it's been so stretching and great to talk about the hows and whys of money management and our own personal experiences and lifestyle in all things money related. We are finding out how much work it is to manage it properly. At the end of our class session a few days ago, a scripture was shared. It is Proverbs 30:8 which states, Remove far from me falsehood and lying; give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me,
The question that was posed after reading through it was when was the last time you prayed that God wouldn't give you riches? How many times do you pray that God will fix things financially by just giving you more money? This question struck me... hmm do I pray for neither poverty or riches? It's a great prayer to pray, that I would have balance in my life, find contentment with what God has given to me and realize that money doesn't solve everything. We are responsible for what God has given to us, He's entrusted us here in America with an abundance if you look at the majority of the world. Do I realize the great blessings I have? The richness of the gifts I've received? Am I content? Do I praise God for what we have? The train of thought continued inward to a heart evaluation.. I've seen with new eyes the blessing of what we have.
The question that was posed after reading through it was when was the last time you prayed that God wouldn't give you riches? How many times do you pray that God will fix things financially by just giving you more money? This question struck me... hmm do I pray for neither poverty or riches? It's a great prayer to pray, that I would have balance in my life, find contentment with what God has given to me and realize that money doesn't solve everything. We are responsible for what God has given to us, He's entrusted us here in America with an abundance if you look at the majority of the world. Do I realize the great blessings I have? The richness of the gifts I've received? Am I content? Do I praise God for what we have? The train of thought continued inward to a heart evaluation.. I've seen with new eyes the blessing of what we have.
I am seeking to be content, it's such a battle in this very materialistic society we live in, it's hard to not be tricked into thinking that want is need. But want is NOT need.. and finding out what is really need and what is only want is sometimes blurry.. praying that God would continue to be patient with me.. I have a long way to go.. but I am thankful for this journey.. grateful for what God is revealing about my heart condition with money and slowly showing me another area in my life where I need more of Him and less of me..
Monday, April 16, 2012
Marriage & Such
I have been quite focused lately on my wonderful husband and his new job. This amazing job, that fits his gifts and abilities so well, it has truly blessed my heart to watch his transition into this job and be a part of the ministry in a small way with him as well.
I've needed some time to process the changes to our life. We've gone from not feeling permanent here in Lincoln to feeling very permanent. It's been about three months now of coping with that and it's still surreal at times . My journey these past few months has included so many high points, I've felt almost as though it's too good to be true at times... which isn't typically my personality, I tend to be ever optimistic, but I've caught myself feeling this, "can it really be this good?" ... And so far.. yup!.. it's a season of God's awesome blessing... thank you Lord for blessing my husband with this job! :)
I am very thankful for Michael and the way that the Lord has bonded us together through these changing times, how we've learned to communicate through stress, anxiety, pressure, uncertainty and still remain strong in our marriage. Praising God today for giving me such an awesome man! Are you wondering if I tell him this all the time? If I feel this way every moment? The answer is..yes ... okay more like, I am trying. I fall short of the perfect wife category by like a million.. and he falls short of perfect too.. But this is not about perfect, it's not about keeping score, or doing everything the way I think he should. It's about the choice to love him anyway, the choice to respect him, honor him and must importantly esteem him.. because don't we all want that from our spouse? Don't you want that for your children from their future spouse? My hope is that at the end of the day, each day, Michael knows that I love him.. no matter what. Praying that my actions and words today affirm what I know to be true. Hoping to be a more loving and supportive wife, there are times when I fall short, but what I've learned over the course of this year is that love remains. It's work, but what joy I feel knowing no matter what life brings, good or bad, I've got a husband willing to stand by me and love me and I will do the same!
I've needed some time to process the changes to our life. We've gone from not feeling permanent here in Lincoln to feeling very permanent. It's been about three months now of coping with that and it's still surreal at times . My journey these past few months has included so many high points, I've felt almost as though it's too good to be true at times... which isn't typically my personality, I tend to be ever optimistic, but I've caught myself feeling this, "can it really be this good?" ... And so far.. yup!.. it's a season of God's awesome blessing... thank you Lord for blessing my husband with this job! :)
I am very thankful for Michael and the way that the Lord has bonded us together through these changing times, how we've learned to communicate through stress, anxiety, pressure, uncertainty and still remain strong in our marriage. Praising God today for giving me such an awesome man! Are you wondering if I tell him this all the time? If I feel this way every moment? The answer is..
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Stumbling through life with His grace...
2 Corinthians 12:9
New International Version (NIV)
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
I have found myself in a place of humble stumbles. You know what I mean? I can't do this life thing on my own. Because I stumble, I say the wrong things, I don't say anything, I stumble around as though I am walking in the dark in the middle of the night bumping into walls and tripping on who knows what. Sometimes life feels just like that...where you don't know where to turn or who to turn to and you feel weak...
I am thankful that I have Jesus. That He directs my steps, which often look very ungraceful.. he is still my ever present light in the darkness, my faithful Savior! What would I do without Him? The world and daily life hold lots of unknowns and uncertainty, but I am thankful for His grace that is sufficient for me. Those words hit me square in the face today... do I live as though His grace is sufficient? Am I living that? Today I just want to shout it off the rooftops... Jesus is enough! No matter what life brings, I hope that I will live out what He's done for me, show the people around me that in every situation He's there and His love sustains us!
Praising God for a brand new day, a new beginning, a joyous celebration for all He's given to us.. my cup is overflowing, He has brought us thorough! His grace is enough for me and the whole world... do you feel it? Do you know it? Remember the hope we have in Christ... celebrate His goodness and grace! His power is made perfect in your weakness. May Christ's power indeed rest upon you today!!
Friday, January 13, 2012
Happy 34th Birthday...
I celebrated my 34th birthday on December 25th, so yes, I know it's not actually my birthday today, but I had the privilege of celebrating it with a wonderful girlfriend today! Teresa took me out to lunch and then to get a pedicure. You should see my cute toes.. they are red and sparkly! :) What a day of pampering it was!
Michael had written in my birthday card that my 35th would be better.. ha ha, due to the circumstances of our life right now, I think he was right... but it's important no matter what is happening to celebrate life. What a blessing it is to have a birthday and to celebrate another year of life.
Today was really fun! I am blessed to have such a wonderful friend who treated me to a wonderful afternoon. It made me stop and give thanks for this past year.. for another year of wisdom, friendships, and life. No matter the circumstances surrounding us right now, there is much to be celebrating!
Michael had written in my birthday card that my 35th would be better.. ha ha, due to the circumstances of our life right now, I think he was right... but it's important no matter what is happening to celebrate life. What a blessing it is to have a birthday and to celebrate another year of life.
Today was really fun! I am blessed to have such a wonderful friend who treated me to a wonderful afternoon. It made me stop and give thanks for this past year.. for another year of wisdom, friendships, and life. No matter the circumstances surrounding us right now, there is much to be celebrating!
Friday, December 9, 2011
Nuggets of wisdom in gift wrapping...
What a wonderful week it's been! I started a new job gift wrapping at Von Maur and I am really loving it. What I've learned while wrapping and fellow shipping with the women I work with is that loving what you do makes a huge impact. The joy that I've experienced in the week I've been there is so refreshing. I've been able to enjoy my shifts because of the attitude of my coworkers. I am one of the "young ones", most of the ladies could easily be my mom.. it's fun to see how seasoned wrappers keep their cool when the gift line gets full and they just seem to enjoy the gift they are on without rushing and they help me keep perspective when it's felt overwhelming.. how I admire their patience.
Enjoying this time of year when life is rushing around us at high speeds seems impossible some days, but what I have been reminded is that taking time to enjoy the moment regardless of the demands is what's most important. Every moment matters! So savor each moment with your family, enjoy the shopping, the wrapping, and breath deep the joy of this remarkable season!
Enjoying this time of year when life is rushing around us at high speeds seems impossible some days, but what I have been reminded is that taking time to enjoy the moment regardless of the demands is what's most important. Every moment matters! So savor each moment with your family, enjoy the shopping, the wrapping, and breath deep the joy of this remarkable season!
Monday, October 24, 2011
Heart of Worship?
I am struggling with this "heart of worship" right now. As I wrote the title of this blog the reality of what it should look like and what my heart actually looks like..well, it's not really reflecting that sentiment. I want to worship, I desire to worship... but I am a bit afraid of all the tears that will come when I take off the mask and really worship. It's not that I'm sad.. I'm not, I'm just in a place where my heart is soft..softer then it's been in good while. God is working on me, He's bringing me to places that are growing me, chiseling me, and really showing me just how much I need to let go of... It's not a process that's all that fun! Trusting that everything will be better is hard...when I feel like I am not sure how much more I can let go of... I like holding on to "my ways" and "my plans" it's hard when I feel like letting go is just too hard & too painful. Also, this whole waiting thing... ugh, it's like the worst thing in the world! I HATE waiting... so, yeah... guess who's having to wait for lots and lots of things right now? Apparently that's another thing I gotta let go of and work on... some days it feels like I am whittled down from a Sequoya tree to a toothpick and I am wondering how much more needs to be refined??... but that's a dangerous question!
Monday, July 18, 2011
Mama said there'd be days like this...
As you read in my earlier blog we were in KC last Wednesday-Friday. So, I was already feeling a bit tired! We had friends over on Saturday night (wonderful time!!), then Sunday morning got the call about my dad and were off to Papillion to visit him in the hospital. After visiting we went to my brother Kraig's for the Women's World Cup Soccer game (sad results!). I stayed with my mom last night along with my brother Kirk and we enjoyed fellowship and helped her out with the dog and she was thankful that she had someone in the camper with her.
This morning went back to the hospital and got the good results about my Dad and were off towards home (thanks Michael for coming to get me!). It's been a whirlwind couple of days for sure! I am tired and thankful all at the same time... so glad I am able to be near my family in times like this. The laughter my family can share at all times never ceases to amaze me... only us could enjoy the language of the nurses and laugh when the nurse is telling us that, "I'm sorry he's gone (for testing)." and my brother Kirk says, "He's gone? We just talked to him," in this fake grieved voice.. the nurse laughed and said it was good that we had such a good sense of humor... we laughed all the more and when we told my dad his response to that was, "You should have asked if I went peacefully!" ahhh we are too much!! :) We are the family who in ICU has to have the door shut due to the spontaneous laughter that explodes down the hall if the doors open... our view on life is fun.. we embrace each obstacle with humor... you should hear the enema story... hahaha.. (but seriously, it's funny!)
However, tonight I am really very tired and have had an emotional roller coaster of feelings.... I've cried a lot and I should probably be in bed, but am going to have a cup a tea due to a sore throat I'm fighting.. my emotions are a bit raw tonight and I needed to be reminded about the joy of laughter...
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Happy Easter!

Praising God for the gift of Jesus! Celebrating the joy and blessing of the cross! He is Risen!! Looking forward to getting together with my family and having a wonderful meal tomorrow. Michael is making lamb, ham, potatoes and squash soup. Yummy!!
I feel so incredibly blessed. I get to wake up tomorrow morning and go to church and then celebrate the day with wonderful people. How great it is to have children, dye eggs, stuff eggs with lots and lots of candy, fill baskets and hide and watch children hunt for eggs.... I am blessed!
Thank you Jesus for the cross, thank you for dying once for all! Enjoy your day celebrating Christ's resurrection!! He is Risen indeed Hallelujah!!
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